To be better at building trust do 7 things to create strong #relationships
Kiếm Tiền Qua Mạng <email@...>
To be better at building trust do 7 things to create strong relationships.
In a recent post on LinkedIn, I polled my community to ascertain their thoughts on trust by asking a simple question.
Is trust something we offer or is it earned?
Over 88% of the 12,000 people that responded said trust is earned.
But is it?
I used to believe the same thing until I realized that most businesses treat people predicated on the idea that trust is earned. Most people treat intimate relationships the same way.
Unfortunately, this creates a tenuous dynamic that results in suspicion, resentment, and frustration.
It’s like being in a relationship with someone with that has “an unpleasant past”.
Their distrust results in possessive behavior that robs the relationship of any chance of succeeding. It’s doomed before it begins.
Live long enough and our hearts get broken by betrayal and deceit.
Stay in business long enough and we will encounter liars and opportunists with no moral compass.
At Weatherology I have created a high trust high reward environment that provides people with the opportunity to build trust based on receiving trust from the inception of our relationship.
The expectations are spelled out from the beginning, and we are uncompromising about their application.
We offer unlimited freedom in exchange for commitment that requires personal and professional excellence, responsibility, trust, and mutual respect.
If that trust is broken, we are done. It’s that simple. No second, third or fourth chances. We move on because we had a deal.
Guess what, almost every single time people rise to the occasion and exceed expectations.
People want to feel trusted and even though there’s no guarantee we won’t get burned, healthily relationships require being vulnerable from the very start. We have no chance of being in love or working with great people if we don’t build trust by offering trust to someone first.
Here are the main reasons I believe offering trust is the best way to ensure we earn someone’s trust in return.
“To be trusted is a greater compliment than being loved.” – George MacDonald
To be better at building trust try doing 7 things to create stronger relationships:
It’s a choice
Trust is a choice. If we chose to trust, we open ourselves to the possibility of sharing something extraordinary. If not, we live in fear filled with suspicion and make assumptions that are often irrational. Could you get burned, yes. Will you ever have healthy connections if you don’t offer trust, no. Does this require being naive, gullible, and easily exploited, of course not.
Most believe pull their past into relationships and expect trust will be earned. In the process, they have massive guards that erode any chance of real growth. It’s an attitude based on rewards. If you earn my trust, then I will trust you. The idea is based on trusting a person’s behavior as an indication of their “trustworthiness”. It’s a never-ending battling that requires constant proof. Build confidence, good judgement and understand your worth. You will recognize unhealthy individuals and avoid bad relationships before they begin.
We ultimately decide how to feel. If we let other people control our emotions, we allow them the power of regulating our happiness. Until we let go of past hurt and allow new relationships the opportunity to flourish, we let the past determine our prospects for future happiness. Once we chose to trust, we release the temptation to hang on to bitterness and resentment, and don’t judge people unfairly based on past relationships. We do the work to move on and heal.
People that lack trust have often been hurt, disappointed and betrayed. I get it. However, if we don’t heal and move forward, we drag that bitterness into every relationship and penalize new people for past indiscretions. We must let go of being a victim and the need to validate our pain by pointing out our tragic past. By constantly being the innocent victim, we don't acknowledge our need for growth and do the work of learning to build trust.
“Breaking someone’s trust is like crumpling up a perfect piece of paper. You can smooth it over but it’s never going to be the same again.”
It’s a process
Building trust is a process. We must do the work of being strong, confident, and emotionally aware. New relationships require honest communication, defined expectations, and commitment. By doing our part, we increase the likelihood of the other part doing their part. If they don’t, we can walk away knowing we did our best and not postpone the difficult decision of moving on. Offer trust and it often gets reciprocated, assuming we are aware enough to recognize other healthy individuals committed to building strong relationships.
It’s about integrity
Building trust requires character, integrity, honesty, commitment, and a generous attitude. When we act with integrity, we attract other quality individuals and recognize people quickly that lack the attributes we value. We become more selective about the people we interact with. When our integrity is intact, we demand the same from other people we most closely associate with.
It’s about communication
From the inception of every relationship, I discuss what’s expected and what won’t be tolerated. It gives everyone involved an opportunity to determine if the parameters are reasonable and fair. When we talk about trust, I discuss what that looks like for me and define what my boundaries are. If those boundaries are violated, so is the covenant between us. I walk away without any inhibitions, remorse, or regret.
“The best way to find out if you can trust somebody is to trust them.” – Ernest Hemingway
Sum it up.
Any other suggestions for building trust in personal and professional relationships? Share your thoughts in the comments section and please like and share this article. I love learning from you as well.
Steve Wohlenhaus is CEO of Weatherology, the leading company in the world at disseminating audio weather information.