(No subject)


eric wolfsbane <wolfsbane@...>
 

Norfolk Southern's Top Ten work rule changes for Conrail Employees

This special Top Ten List comes straight from NS corporate
headquarters,
located behind Sam Drucker's General Store, Hooterville, North
Carolina.

The Top Ten changes in work rules expected to most adversely affect
former CONRAIL employees:

10. All locomotives must now have gun racks.

9. Instead of meal tickets, train crews will be issued a Coca Cola
and
a Moon Pie.

8. Train crew headgear must display the "Redman" chewing tobacco
logo.

7. All train crews are now required to have a coon dog asleep on the
front platform of the locomotive.

6. Each crewmember must put sticker for favorite NASCAR driver in cab
windows and an NRA Freedom bumper sticker on the cab nose.

5. Robert E. Lee's birthday now a paid holiday; 4th of July (fall of
Vicksburg) a day of mourning.

4. All yards required having at least two inoperable locos on blocks
in
front of the yard office.

3. Grade crossing whistle signal is now the first 12 notes
of "Dixie."

2. All radio transmissions now required to end with "Y'all."

And the Number One change to CONRAIL work rules after the NS
takeover:

1. Road Foreman of Engines job title changed to Overseer!

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