Re: Mums and computers


Schuyler <s.waynforth@...>
 

However, his behavior this evening was
upsetting. After a day spent with his friend, we arrived home in time to
shower, eat dinner, and go to bed. When told there wasn't time to play the game

he immediately began crying, escalating to almost screaming. He refused to eat
dinner. I helped him to process his feelings, expressed how disappointed he
must feel, and reminded him of his fun day and that the game would be available
tomorrow. I gave him time to calm down and eat if he chose ( he even said how
hungry he was but that he was not going to eat ). He still chose not to eat.
This extreme reaction bothered me ( I do understand his disappointment ) and
makes me less inclined to let him play to his heart's content. Any feedback??

-------------

When Simon goes out for the day one of the things he really looks forward to is
coming home and doing something on the computer. If I smacked down his hopes for
doing that I imagine he'd be pretty pissed off. Could he have eaten dinner while
playing at the computer? Could he have taken a shower in the morning? Could he
have played a little later into the evening rather than going to bed at his
usually bedtime? Were there more options available to you than seeing his
upsetness as being some sort of evidence that video games are controlling him?

Imagine that you'd had a really big day and were hungry and tired and came home
to be told that you couldn't do something that you really wanted to do.
Something that you'd thought about in moments when you were out with pleasure
and anticipation. Something that you knew would help to relax you, to wind you
down. Have a glass of wine, or a piece of bread that you'd baked that morning.
Watch a television show that was on that evening, read the next chapter in a
book that you were really enjoying. Someone who had power over you decided that
you couldn't do whatever it was that you were wanting to do because you needed
to eat dinner, shower and go to bed. Would you savor your meal? Would you enjoy
the feeling of the warm water cascading over you in the shower? Would you fall
asleep peacefully? Or would each and every one of those experiences be tainted
by the power that someone else had wielded over you, poisoned by your own
powerlessness, your weakness in the face of someone else's flexed muscle?

I would have gone on a hunger strike, too.

Schuyler

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