Re: guilt over saying no and what am I doing wrong?-re-breathless


***But that also comes back into play with giving them everything resulting in
children always expecting everything. Won't that follow them all their lives?
Part of me says that they can't go through life expecting to always get
everything they want because they won't always get it, but the other part says
that if they learn creative ways to do that now, they will find ways later. So
am I spoiling (I know children don't spoil, but I'm picturing whiny give me,
give me scene here.) them or training them to be creative?***

You shouldn't do either of those 2 things. The goal isn't to manipulate the
kids to behave a certain way. The goal is peace around a feeling of lack. I've
felt what it feels like to have no money for food. That's a big ugly feeling,
but in the middle of all that feeling you can still choose to see abundance. I
can go into my pantry and see what I DO have. I can see that I have rice and
milk, or running water and dishes and soap to clean them. Parents can be a
buffer for their kids for monetary lack, they really can.

What I DO have an abundance of is time. My kids get me, I can give them the
gift of me. In all the abundance that *I* have, with time and all my creative
resources, I can do things with and for my kids, things that they perhaps don't
think of on their own. With my wealth of knowledge, by being older and having
more ideas and experiences to draw from, I can share all that with my kids. I
CAN fill up a swimming pool, I CAN find things to play with in water. I CAN
make paper airplanes with scraps of paper and I CAN make bird feeders out of
recycled things with leftover birdseed.

I order for kids to feel and see abundance, they first must have parents who
feel and see it too, even IF there is no money. Go to parks, pick up sticks,
ride bikes to new places, swing on the swing differently, make bubbles and blow
them in front of a fan. Look at stars at night and try to find constellations,
light things on fire with magnifying glass, roast hot dogs for dinner (it's
cheap), the possibilities are limitless, but only if you choose to see them.
THAT is what will help your kids learn how to be creative thinkers, by seeing
and doing creative things.

Join { to automatically receive all group messages.